The sun set at 8:23pm today. I missed much of it, despite the amazing view I have from the upstairs at Bauhaus, a popular cafe here in Seattle. I looked up, and from my seat I saw the Space Needle in all its glory, the tangerine sun kissing its neck like a phat topaz necklace. I noted the beauty of that moment, the beauty of this city, was taking it all in, and then... my phone buzzed.
A text message. I attended to the text. Oh, I remembered, I need to send that e-mail right now.
A few more minutes of getting side tracked, and the next thing I know, I look up to see that the sun had arched its way across the cloud-dusted pink and lavender sky. It was now curving its way back down, preparing to disappear behind the Olympic mountains. I watched as it waned from plump tangerine to sweet mandarin slice, then to topaz fleck, then orange christmas-light, then nothing as it was swallowed by the Olympics.
Hmm. Too bad. A beautiful moment passed and I missed it by allowing myself to get side-tracked by... stuff and things and whatnot.
I don't want that to be my life. I don't want to miss out on the beautiful moments and then look back and be like, wait, what? How did that happen? I want to look at the sunsets every chance I get, and do all the other equivalent things that I need to do so that when the last gold fleck turns day into night I don't feel like I missed out.
Perhaps I'm thinking about this stuff so much because right now I am supposed to be allowing myself to get my head back on straight after a rough couple of years-- a time that has been peppered with loss, grief, and other craziness. During this time (which conveniently coincides with my job search) I'm supposed to be journaling, writing poetry, performing spoken word, reading, putting together scrap books, traveling, doing all this kind of reflective, soul-nurturing stuff. Instead, with the exception of some writing here and there, I have found myself totally distracted and side-tracked by lots of day to day nothingness. Some of it is other people's drama, some of it is self-created drama. Not good.
Thank God for this blog. It's my accountability buddy. Thank God for the beautiful Seattle sunset. It was a timely reminder.